COMNUTS

The People's Commissariat for Mergers, Acquisitions and Beer Nuts

Michael Alexenko
People's Commissar for Mergers, Acquisitions and Beer Nuts

Second Monopoly Commission Chartered
COMNUTS is happy to announce that a serious problem in the administration of Mergers and Acquisitions has been corrected. Until the creation of the new Second Monopoly Commission there was only one Monopoly Commission in charge of monopolies. Citizens may now take monopoly complaints to either the Monopoly Commission or the Second Monopoly Commission. Competition between the two commissions should result in faster action and fist fights down at the People's Commissariats Barn.

False Advertising
It has come to the attention of the Commissariat that Beer Nuts are not, in fact, made from beer. If you find this disturbing the Commissar recommends that you have another beer.